Bite and Devour: Conflict in the Local Church
Galatians 5:15 “But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another.”
The book of Galatians is likely Paul’s very first epistle to the churches planted in the region of Galatia. It was written in respond to problems he heard about as the Judaizers had begun to add things to the gospel resulting in church confusion and conflict. The verse above is a strong admonition, a warning to the church, not to engage in destructive conflict. Paul follows this admonition with the single clarion call back to the fundamentals of the gospel: we are all sinners saved by grace and it is the gospel that still changes the human heart from the initial point of salvation to our final breath. In the journey of walking with Christ and one another in local church partnership, be careful when conflict occurs.
The District staff are occasionally pulled into internal struggles in an effort to provide objective feedback and course correction. We are happy to help in this way. I like to say that I am both “a fireman” putting out fires and “a fertilizer” helping add fuel to healthy growth.
In American culture, we see increasing levels of polarization and intense debate leading to character assassination. Too many Christians participate in this kind of relational vitriol—especially online and through email. I want to implore our pastors and the elders who help oversee the church that the way of Jesus was a humble, gentle, and determined mode of leadership and we should emulate his model.
I love Paul’s prayer in Colossians 1:9-14. It is timeless and so appropriate. This is what we in Converge Great Lakes pray for you.
And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him: bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God: being strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy; giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.
If you pray this way for one another and aim to live fully trusting the Lord with your own heart, you will not drift from the gospel of hope and life.
5 Tips for Conflict Conversations
Don’t do conflict resolution via text or email. Insist on meeting in person to talk.
Check your own heart to make sure you are not functioning out of a posture of self righteousness, bitterness, or anger. Humility and candor is the goal in tough conversations.
Go to the person and refuse to gossip or triangulate.
Listen carefully for things the Lord may want to teach you and change in you during a tough conversation.
Readily offer and ask for forgiveness so as to rebuild trust.